Distance
by Lil Einjeru
Summary: I am Natsuki Kuga, an abandon child in the Kuga Family... who was dumped by my lover, Shizuru Fujino like an over used equipment...
1. Chapter 1

This is my new fan fiction and my apologies for not being able to finish A different world, but I will try to continue it... I'm just having some trouble with personal life. Enjoy.

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_**Natsuki's POV.**_

Letting my tears leak out from my eyelid was something I don't usually do... But the longer I kept sitting here, staring out at the night sky... I could feel something tugging my heart... The feeling was so weird yet so painful... It wasn't the usual physical pain... I could feel the pain everywhere... it was hard to describe where it is... The pain was so unbearable that I wish I could just stop breathing...

I didn't know how long have I been sitting here on the roof top of Fuuka Dormitory. But I just didn't bother... It was actually a peaceful but painful place for me...

_**Flashback**_

"Natsuki?" hearing Shizuru calling, I turn to see her smiling face. How can someone be so pretty yet graceful even when she all she did is smile?

"Yeah? Anything?" I asked as curiosity kicked in.

"Can you follow me? I want to bring you somewhere." Shizuru said as she held on to my hand tugging it to give me a hinting to follow her. I only smiled and nodded my head. Making sure my grip on her hand was sufficient, I let her led me to the place she wanted to bring me.

Walking up the stairs, I started to feel weird as the route she took was to head all the way up to the roof of our dormitory. I look at her dumbfounded as we reached the roof.

"Ne Natsuki?" Shizuru called me as she took out her cell phone and played a song then she turned around to face me with a smile. "Wanna dance?" she asked as she extended her hand towards me.

Feeling the heat on my face, I thanked god that it was at night and we are only illuminated by the moon light. I took her hand and said "Of course." We started to dance slowly as the song started to proceed.

_If I had to live my life without you near me  
The days would all be empty  
The nights would seem so long  
With you I see forever oh so clearly  
I might have been in love before  
But it never felt this strong  
Our dreams are young and we both know  
They'll take us where we want to go  
Hold me now, touch me now  
I don't want to live without you_

Smiling, I rest my head on Shizuru's shoulders as she led the dance. I could feel light peeks on my forehead as we danced.

_Nothing's gonna change my love for you  
You ought to know by now how much I love you  
One thing you can be sure of  
I'll never ask for more than your love  
Nothing's gonna change my love for you  
You ought to know by now how much I love you  
The world may change my whole life through  
But nothing's gonna change my love for you_

"Ara, Natsuki seems to be enjoying herself." Shizuru teased as she patted my head. I said nothing except nodding my head, totally into the dance. Slowly, we continued to shift our weight on either side of our legs as the music plays out.

"I love you, Shizuru..." I mumbled out as I blush with my confession

"Ara... How much?" Shizuru said with a sly grin on her face.

Blushing even harder now, I stared at my feet and said... "From Earth to the most unattainable planet, called Shizuru's heart."

When the song finally ended, Shizuru tilted my head up slowly. Finally when my eyes were fixed on the beautiful red ruby, I was kissed by an angel. It was heaven...

"I love you, Natsuki... "Shizuru whispered before continuing to kiss me, preventing me from replying her.

_**End of Flashback**_

'How did things ended up this way...' I thought to myself as memories drills deep into my ribs, puncturing my lungs and grasping all my remaining breath away. I could feel a huge cold lump in my throat, blocking my intake of oxygen whilst my punctured lungs, seeping out my remaining oxygen...

Even so, I was still alive, my heart beating irregularly and painfully. The numbness of my whole being and the unknown source of coldness indulge me completely. Who would have thought... that love would be so painful? Who would have guessed that me, the Ice Princess, would suffer in the world of depression because of a certain person.

A certain person who has gave me a chance to feel happy for the first time in my entire life, letting me feel so loved and cared for... only to leave me in the end...

Shizuru Fujino was the "certain person"... My first love... and probably my last love... Yeah... you heard me right... It's our president of student council... Shizuru Fujino, a very collected, elegant and the most beautiful person I have ever set my eyes on...

I cried for god knows how long. How I wish that something like this never happened... How if wish that love was never this painful...

"Drip, drip..." The sound of the dropping tears in the sky. Slowly, the tears poured out more and more... and more... Swallowing my fragile body with its tears, covering my completely as I trembled within its cold touch...

'Perhaps... this is what I get now... I should get used to it... the... emptiness... and the loneliness... once again...' I thought to myself...

Yeah... I am Natsuki Kuga, an abandon child in the Kuga Family... who was dumped by my lover, Shizuru Fujino just like an over used equipment... Just like how others have been treating me... And I thought... she was different...

_**To be continued...**_

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**_Please excuse my English... It's never my main language... _**  
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	2. Chapter 2

Okay, here's chapter 2, hopefully it is up to your expectation. Dx

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_**Natsuki's POV**_

_RIIIIINNNNNGGGG!_ Startled with the sound of the alarm clock, I jumped and sat up completely on the bed. 'Wha... I don't remember having any alarm clock. God my head hurts...' I thought as I placed my hand on my head and realization slapped me on my face. The alarm clock belongs to my roommate, Shizuru Fujino.

The exact same moment when the name "Shizuru" came into my mind, I could feel my soul being drained out completely and the lonely feeling hits me with its full force. I grasp in pain as memories slowly makes its torturing way into my heart as I held my chest tightly with tears forming at the edge of my eyes.

'I... I wish the pain would stop...' I wished so greatly as a lone tears rolled down my cheek.

_RIIIIINNNNGGGGG! _The sound of the alarm slowly reminded me of its existence.

"She probably brought that alarm yesterday... because she doesn't want to rely on me to wake her up..." I mumbled to myself as I stare at the alarm clock with sadness. Sighing, I pushed aside my blanket and got up, noting that it is 6 am in the morning as I walked over to Shizuru's table.

As soon as I silenced Shizuru's clock, Shizuru shifted her position and faced me. I froze immediately as I am now facing her sleeping figure, facing her ever so smooth and peaceful face.

My breath was caught in my throat as I stood there, staring at the love of my life. My miserable tears threaten pour out again. That moment of time, I wished I was dead. That moment of time, I wished that I didn't survive after being thrown out from the car.

I felt like I was transferred to a box, a box that was filled with ice cubes where it numbs me completely. Trembling, I slowly guided my hands to her face. "Shi... Shizuru..." I mumbled her name and my heart were painfully ripped off from my chest cavity.

I stopped. I stopped advancing my hand. It was just an inch away from Shizuru's smooth skin. It was only an inch away from me to feel the warmth of Shizuru. I just stopped.

'That is a forbidden area... I'm not allowed to touch it... ' I reminded myself as I shut my eyes tightly; feeling as if my lungs were stolen from me.

God, please just spare me. I beg of you... It feels like there is someone stabbing me with a blunt rusty knife. It hurts... It pains me...

Clenching my fist, I slowly retract my hands back to my side. My heart felt like it has lost its will to function and it feels so heavy and painful.

Drip, Drip, Drip...

My tears are now pouring out endlessly as I stood there, trying my best to let out a cry as I cover my mouth with my hand as hard as possible. Slowly, I started to drop to the ground as my knee's begun to give way and I ended up resting my head on the floor with my free hand clenching tightly on my chest.

Coldness absorbs me completely as I kneeled there on the floor crying.

'Shizuru... Shizuru... Shizuru...' I mentally chanted her name over and over again.

_**Flashback..**_

"Shizuru! Shizuru get up! Your gonna be late!" I said as I slowly shook Shizuru's shoulders.

"nnn... 10 more mi-minutes" Shizuru mumbled as she pulled her blanket over her shoulders and curls her body into a foetal position.

"You're the president of the student council for heaven's sake! GET UP!" I growled as I forcefully yank Shizuru's blanket only to catch Shizuru wearing nothing except for her lingerie.

'H... holy hell... that is so sexy.' I thought as my mouth finds its way to the floor not knowing that a pair of ruby eyes was watching me.

"Ara, does Natsuki likes what she is looking at?" Shizuru said teasingly as she seductively stretches her body while I was blown into a full blush.

"B... Baka!" I said as I stood up and walked over to the kitchen, ignoring Shizuru's whimpers.

Shizuru was never a morning person no matter how hard you try to wake up her. Usually, the only way to wake her up is by a simple dish of scrambled eggs and tea.

Yeah, you heard me... Shizuru's obsess on having scrambled eggs for breakfast. It was the only way to make sure she is fully awake.

After a few minutes, I walked out of the kitchen with a plate of scrambled eggs and a cup of tea with a smile plastered on my face as Shizuru was already sitting on the dining table waiting for her "secret remedy".

"Ara, Ookini Natsuki." Shizuru said as she started eating.

"Its fine, I find it cute that you would be so obsess on scramble eggs considering how health conscious you were." I said as I started to eat my Mayo sandwich.

"Ara, it is however, much healthier then the white substance you are consuming."

"Hey! Mayo is not unhealthy!" I argued back but only to receive a smile from my beautiful angel.

_**End of Flashback...**_

I sob silently as my hand moved to stir the scrambled egg with the wooden spatula like what I have been doing for a year.

After a few minutes, I walked out from the kitchen holding on a plate of scrambled egg and tea before placing them on Shizuru's study table. Looking at Shizuru's sleeping figure, I shook my head as I stared at the floor sadly before taking out a piece of paper and scribble "Eat well... –N-" to Shizuru.

"I... should start packing... and hopefully find an empty apartment to rent..." I mumbled silently as I slowly set Shizuru's alarm clock to 6.45am. Hoping that this time, Shizuru would be able to wake up with the smell of scrambled egg.

As I was walking back to my side of the room, my eyes caught a piece of paper in Shizuru's dustbin. I knew what it was... It was a picture of us during the school carnival. Sighing, I picked up the piece of picture and gave out a small sad look before keeping it in between one of my text book.

Looking at Shizuru's sleeping figure one last time, I mouthed "I love you, Shizuru Fujino" and started to pack my bags. With every clothes I fold, I could feel my heart bleed a little more.

"This is all for her... She'll be happier this way..." I said that repeatedly. 'I'll be okay as long as she's happy...' with the final thought, I zipped up my bag filled with my essential items before placing them back into the cupboard.

Resting my hand on the surface of the cupboard, I closed my eyes trying my best to tame my wild roaring emotions. Throwing myself on the bed, I pulled my knees as close as possible towards my chest.

'We are completely over...How I wish I didn't survive that incident. At least I do not have to go through this pain...' I thought miserably as my tiredness slowly consumes me, forcing me back to my unwanted memory of childhood.

_**Flashback...**_

"PAPA! Please stop!" I screamed frantically as I held on the handle with my life in line.

"I WISHED YOU HAVE DIED WITH SAEKO!" My biological father said with rage within his angry emerald eyes.

With that being said, my own father, Ken Kuga, using all his strength to yank me free from my grip on the handle and threw me out. Out towards the deep slope where my mother crashed and died. He threw me out from the car and down to the rocky seas.

I screamed out in fear, I screamed out for help.

I could see the violent sea, hitting on the rocky shore angrily.

'Help me... Mama...' It was all I could think off at that moment.

Closer, and Closer I am to the sea...

Then it happen, my body slammed into the cold and harsh sea. It was painful but that wasn't the end, I was thrown left and right by the violent sea. I could feel my knee's hitting the sharp edges of the rock; my back scrapes hits strongly on the other rock and the painful snap that was heard as my elbow came in contact with the edge of a different rock.

It was then my whole body was engulfed in the most severe pain that words can never explain.

The horrible sea eating my flesh through my open wounds, the unexplainable pain from my elbow...

Slowly, my vision starts to fade as the pain intensifies and my lungs BURNED for air.

That exact moment, I could see Saeko mama giving me a small but sad smile.

"Ma...Ma..." I mouthed as I was completely swallowed by darkness.

_**End of Flashback...**_

**To be continued.**

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Silver-Eyed-Rukia – Thank you for your advice, I'll consider it thoroughly.

SKULLCANDii – Thank you for the compliments =]

Okami-chin – This is my new chapter... hopefully it's up to your expectation

Garrita salvatrucha – uhhh thanks? Though i'll pretty much understand what you mean more if it is in English .

ShadowCub – i hope this is up to your expectation

fyee – the reason for why Shizuru left Natsuki will be explained... just not for now xD

kuroi sensei – ooo... fellow Malaysian! I'm from penang anyways but thanks for your support!

MegaAuthor – passes tissue, you okay there? O_o

Kuro~ - i'm glad it did =]


	3. Chapter 3

I'm sorry for such a late update. I was having my practical examination so I had to start studying and try my best to recall all the practical techniques. Nevertheless, I didn't waste time and started writing on this chapter. Do enjoy.

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**Normal POV**

"Natsuki? Natsuki-san?" Opening her eyes, the raven haired girl turned her gaze towards the caller.

"What is it?" Natsuki asked in monotone as she sat up straight against her chair only to realized that school's over and half of the students have went back home.

"Are... Are you sick? You've been sleeping almost all day in class. The teachers are getting worried because you don't seem to reply them... It's just not you." The busty girl with flaming orange haired named Mai asked Natsuki.

As if hitting the jackpot, Natsuki winced and clenches her hand into a fist. Her heart rate slowly picked up its pace and she could feel pain on each beat for her heart. Shutting her eyes tightly, Natsuki took in a deep breath to calm herself and her irregular heart beat.

"Na... Natsuki? Are you okay?" Mai asked in concern again.

'_If I tell you my problem... does it ease my pain? Does it bring Shizuru back to me? No... It doesn't help one bit.' _Natsuki thought. _'Wait... this shouldn't be the point. People like her, are better off away from me...'_

"I'm fine." Natsuki said out coldly as she stood up from her place.

"You sure? You can tell me if something is bothering you..." Mai's sentence was interrupted when she received a cold-death-glare from a certain lone wolf who stood in front of her.

_'Shove her away from your life!' _Natsuki mentally scolded herself. _'Unless you want your life to be even more ruined!' _Natsuki's thoughts continued.

"I am nothing but F.I.N.E, fine! I'd prefer you not coming close to me. So, I'll thank you for being concern about me but you shall take your leave and so will I." Natsuki hissed coldly. "Besides, it's none of your concern." The bluenette continued before walking out from the classroom with her belongings.

'_Human beings can never be trusted...'_ Natsuki thought as she could feel a tug in her heart. A surge of memories on Shizuru attacked Natsuki and slowly the unbearable pain starting to creep to Natsuki's senses.

"Damn it!" Natsuki growled as she picked up her pace and in no time, she was running. As if she is trying to run away from the pain and memories.

"If you said your fine... why do you look so sad?" Mai mumbled to herself as her eyes were locked to where the lone wolf has disappeared. Sighing, Mai packed her belongings before heading back home.

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Walking among the crowds, Natsuki's eyes were scanning through the houses to rent along with the pricing. But luck was never on her side as she inwardly growled. Most of the house which was near to school were either too expensive for her expenses or she has to share it with someone. Both of those criteria are basically not what Natsuki wants.

Pinching the bridge of her nose, Natsuki let out a very tired and frustrating sigh which didn't go unnoticed by one of the land lord.

"Excuse me miss, but I've been seeing you wondering around, are you looking for a house to rent?"

"Yeah... But don't worry about it. I can't afford to rent any with the ridiculous pricing." Natsuki shrugged as she slumps her shoulders in defeat.

"I apologize for the price... but you seem rather too young to be renting a house... why don't you stay in the dorms?" The guy asked again in concern.

Just hearing the word dorms, Natsuki couldn't control her emotion as her eyes showed signs on sadness.

_**Flashback...**_

' _Brrr, brrrrr' the sound of Natsuki's cell phone vibration didn't fail to wake the emerald eye princess._

_Slowly opening her eyes, the raven haired girl grabbed her cell phone and shut her alarm off before dragging herself off from her bed to the bathroom._

_The cold droplets of washes through the blunette's pale body yet, she felt nothing. She felt very incomplete. It was as if she is just an empty casket. _

_As she was washing off the soap from her body, her eyes caught a familiar shining object attached to her wedding finger. Looking at the ring with an engraving "S&N" situated in Natsuki's wedding finger brought Natsuki back into her memories of how the rings were created. _

_Needles and daggers of pain and loneliness suddenly pierced Natsuki endlessly and she slowly rested herself on her knees. At that very moment, the ring had failed its duty to bring Natsuki happiness but instead, it pushed the raven haired girl deeper into her misery._

_Unable to keep her voice in, Natsuki let out a choke and broke down in tears._

'_Shizuru, Shizuru, Shizuru...' Natsuki mentally chanted Shizuru's name over and over again, still wishing that it was all a bad dream._

_After a few minutes, the raven haired beauty finally comes out from the bathroom, clad with her hooded clothes and messy school vest. As she walked towards her study table to grab her bag, she noticed a silver ring, placed on her study table. _

_Instantly, Natsuki's eyes turned emotionless. Lying on her study table was an identical ring that Natsuki wore on her wedding finger. It was Shizuru's ring. _

'_I guess... there isn't any point on praying or begging... It is just not possible for us to be together anymore...' _

_Giving out a desperate and sad sigh, Natsuki instantly grab the ring and placed it into her pocket before walking out with her bag pack._

_**End of flashback...**_

"Hello? Miss?" The land lord called to Natsuki whilst waving his hand, snapped the lone wolf from her misery.

"S-sorry... What was it that you were saying?" Natsuki asked back as she blushed lightly.

"Its fine, but I know of a friend who is the owner of a HiME mechanic."

"And... what does that have to do with me finding a house?" Natsuki questioned.

"Well... I was thinking that this information might help you." The guy said to Natsuki as he hands over a piece of leaflet.

Upon taking the leaflet, Natsuki started reading its contents and slowly, she understood what the land lord meant.

"As you can see... He is looking for a replacement worker as one of his mechanic absconded from work 2 months ago. If I'm not wrong, he even provides a place to stay. A one bedded apartment which is perhaps two blocks away from here. Approximately 10 minutes walk from the garage. His name is Yamada."

'_Holy... it's even near Fuuka!' _Natsuki's face lighten up as she notice that she might have a chance to get an apartment.

As Natsuki was mentally cheering for a turn of bad luck, the land lord look Natsuki's slightly brighten up expression as a confirmation that she was interested in the offer.

"By the way, I'm Shinji Rodsan. But you can call me Shinji. If you are really up to the offer, I could give him a ring right now. Perhaps he would take you in." Shinji said enthusiastically as he takes out his cellphone.

"That'll be great! Thanks you Shinji." Natsuki replied as she tried her best to beam out a smile which failed miserably. Without further delay, Shinji expertly dialed the number to call his friend.

'_If... if this Yamada guy accepts me... then... perhaps Shizuru doesn't have to see my face any longer... It might make her happier that way.'_ Natsuki said mentally as she could feel her heart being squeezed hard and pulled away. It was painful to bear that thought but Natsuki took in a few deep breaths to stabilize herself from crying in public.

"Excuse me, my friend said he'll be delighted to interview you if possible, Miss ugh..." Shinji shrugged.

"Kuga- Kuga Natsuki."

"Miss Kuga, here's the address, Yamada will be waiting for you in his office." Shinji said as he smiled at Natsuki.

"Thank you for helping me. It means a lot to me." Natsuki replied as she bowed slightly.

"It's alright, you look rather distressed upon finding a house and it seems your high school doesn't have a dorm for you to stay in. But that is only my perception on your reaction previously. Anyway, you better get going." Shinji said as he chuckled lightly.

"Again, thank you." Natsuki thanked Shinji one last time before walking towards the direction where she has left her Ducati.

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"You seem to be genuinely interested with the offer my friend, Shinji has recommended." The guy named Yamada said as he slowly stroked his chin as in if is considering Natsuki's request.

"Please... It is fine if I'm not paid as I work. I just need a place to stay." Natsuki mumbled softly but still audible to Yamada.

"That would be very much unfair but agreeable."Yamada said as he paused to think about something else.

Natsuki on the other hand were nervous as she started trembling slightly.

_'Please say yes..' _The lone wolf mentally hoped.

"How about this, you'll work here and I shall provide you with shelter and also some food for you every day. Is it a deal? Of course, I'll provide you with transportation fee as well. But in return, I'd want you to work without slacking. I know you're new to this kind of environment but you'll be the best of it within a few months time." Yamada suggested his opinion not failed to give out a crooked smile.

'_What... This deal is better than I expected. With free lodging, food and transportation fee, it would be awesome!' _Natsuki thought in disbelief after hearing the offer.

"So, what is your answer?" Yamada said with a grin. "Shinji recommended you, so you must have caught his eyes. Besides, I like your personality of being independent." Yamada continued as he gives Natsuki thumbs up.

"E-Excuse me? I mean... ugh- It's not-"Before Natsuki could finish her sentence, Yamada interrupted "Its fine, I don't want to pry your private life. So how's the deal?"

'_Deal? Oh yeah! The deal... If I do this... If I move out, I won't be seeing her anymore... but... this if for her... so...' _Natsuki debated as she could feel a huge cold lump in her throat, threatening to burst out.

For a moment there, Natsuki felt doubtful. It is unbelievable that she was getting a free lodging but on the contrary, she would NEVER see the chestnut beauty anymore. With that thought in mind, Natsuki paled instantly. Her heart started to throb painfully and she could feel herself suffocating.

"Kuga-san? Is the deal not good enough?" Yamada questioned the doubtful expression plastered on Natsuki's face.

Upon hearing Yamda's sentence, Natsuki broke out of her own world and instantly nodded her head in agreement. "No! The deal is awesome! I'll take it! In fact, I would wish to move in today!"

"Whoa, calm down now lil pup. No need for the rush." Yamada said as he chuckled which made Natsuki blush out of embarrassment. "Hold on here while I get you the keys."

"I'd prefer to be a wolf..." Natsuki mumbled silently at Yamada's retreating figure.

Sighing, Natsuki popped herself on the chair. She was mentally and emotionally exhausted. She could feel the pure urge to see the crimsoned eyed angel. To feel the love that they once had, to be able to hug her like they used to do and even to spend time with Shizuru leisurely was something Natsuki wished for.

'_Stop day dreaming... It's impossible... even if a small wish of being hugged by her is impossible...'_

Shutting her eyes, Natsuki could feel her world crumble down to ashes. Her once perfect world has no longer existed and the happiness that she had attained after so many years of betrayed and pain vanished without any trace.

At the same moment, Natsuki felt like dying, she no longer felt the meaning to live on as if she is a complete worthless human being alive in earth. As much as she tried to keep her tears in bay, it was impossible as tears were streaming down her cheek.

Unknowing to her, a pair of eyes were staring at the Natsuki, looking at the vulnerable girl crying hopelessly as if she had lost all hopes in the world.

'_At least I do not feel guilty for shunting you away... The moment you step into my garage, those lonely and sad eyes were the only thing that I noticed first... I may not know what the hell happened to you or where your parents are, but you reminded me of myself when I am young...' _Yamada thought as a sad smile appeared.

"Kuga-san? Let's go to your new apartment." Yamada said as he approached the lone figure.

Shocked, Natsuki quickly wiped her tears away and recomposed herself.

"R-right, let's go!" Natsuki said as she picked up her helmet.

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Unlocking the door with a small click, Natsuki tried her best to be stealth to enter her room in order to move her belongings to her new apartment whilst praying that Shizuru isn't in the room.

'_Please don't be there, please don't be there... I don't think I can bear the pain anymo-" _Natsuki's prayers were cut short as her sad, lonely and exhausted emerald eyes met ruby eyes.

'_Shit...' _Natsuki mentally cursed her luck as the crimson eyes showed irritation.

Natsuki could feel the dangerous urge arising as they continued staring into each other's eyes. Feeling even more sad and intimidated, Natsuki was the first to break the glance as she casted her gaze to the cold floor. Tears were already threatening to pour out and her hands were trembling in pain and solitude.

"Kuga-san" The perfect Kyoto-ben was coated with pure coldness came out from Shizuru's mouth. It struck her painfully, directly into her already throbbing heart making Natsuki felt even more wretched.

Watching as the chestnut haired beauty open her mouth, a knife of fear and remorse stabbed deeply into Natsuki's wound, digging and prying it bigger.

"I'm sorry! I-I'm... I-" Natsuki blurred out as she shut her eyes tight, fearing to hear another sentence from Shizuru.

'_Please don't ruin my precious memories I had with you... Please don't. It-It's the only thing I have left...' _

"I- I'm moving... So, I apologize for d-disturbing you. Y-you don't have to-"Natsuki's sentence died as she choked a sob unintentionally. Tears were now pouring out from the emerald eyes.

_'Please tell me to stay... tell me that this is not what you wished for. Please..'_Natsuki prayed to hear the words from Shizuru's honey coated mouth but only silence replied her.

'_You don't have t-to suffer to see me anymore...'_Natsuki mentally finished her unfinished sentence as sadness consumes her completely. Not wanting Shizuru to see her pathetic being, Natsuki quickly grab her last belongings that she had packed and dashes out from the room, slamming the door in the process.

Shizuru, on the other hand were shocked. One, she never expected Natsuki to broke into tears when all the while, the fault was in the raven beauty's hands **(1).** Two, it pained her that the person she once loved were crying. As much as Shizuru remembers, the Ice princess was strong in personality and rarely breaks down. **(2)**

Not knowing what to say, Shizuru decided to just keep quiet. Her hands were holding on a black envelope which was addressed to Natsuki.

Shizuru's mind was still playing the whole event where the Ice princess apologizes until the slamming of the room door.

'_Ara... something is definitely out of place...'_ Shizuru thought as she turn to place the letter on the table before using her laptop, trying to read the letter that was forwarded to Shizuru which caused the whole even between the two lovers. **(3)**

Not knowing to Shizuru that the black letter had a small signature that went unnoticed by her trained crimson eyes. The signature writes out "Ken Kuga."**(4)**

_**To be continued...**_

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**(1) Obviously, someone has been playing a very bad bad thing between both of them, causing our two favourite parings to break up. (Sheez I'm not THAT cruel to cause those two to break up out of no good reason!)**

**(2) It just proves to you that Natsuki doesn't usually break down when she was around Shizuru, knowing that it would have made Shizuru feel sad.**

**(3) Yes, yes and yes. All of this was planned by someone. And of course I'll reveal what happened perhaps in the next few chapters or chapter 4.**

**(4) As you all know it, and perhaps read it right. The letter is from the one and only cruel being, Natsuki's father. **

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I don't think this chapter is very well written. There's just too much ideas running while in my mind currently and it's getting hard for me to concentrate. Do accept my sincere apology.

Garrita Salvatrucha – No harm done. xD and Thank you for following my story

SKULLCANDii – The reason for Natsuki's pain will be revealed but not that fast. =/ and I apologize for updating late. I'm having a massive flight of ideas regarding this story, making me delete over and over again. And I ended up with this one. I hope it isn't disappointing.

Fyee – Sorry for making you sad. ._. I hope you enjoy this chapter

MegaAuthor – omg... bleeding heart! We need a SURGEON! On second thoughts, wanna try my super awesome skill? ;D -beams evilly-

Kitty – I'm not an emotion killer... T_T it is kinda cruel to put it that way...

Zzzz – How our favorite wolf survives will be revealed in the further chapter.

Kuro~ - Thank you =]

Okami-Chin – I'm glad you love it ;D

Aya 1920 – Ara... Same interest as in?


	4. Chapter 4

-Apologizes- I have no excuses for this horrible wait... Have a stupid messed up life. Nevertheless please enjoy.

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**Natsuki's POV**

"_Okay! Hey... a... yo... okay?" someone's voice rings into my ears, but it wasn't clear._

'_What?' I tried to talk, but there was no voice. I couldn't open my eyes and I was drowned in darkness._

"_Dude... Bleeding!" uttered another person._

'_Bleeding?' I thought. 'Where am I?' I continued to wonder. I tried to pry open my eyes, as I was curious of who is surrounding me, who are those people talking to me. No matter how hard I try, I still couldn't move._

_Then loud footsteps were heard and it was approaching nearer. 'Who is it?' I tried to ask in fear, but again, there was no voice. My heart started to race in fear, I can't see, I can't talk and I can't even move!_

'_What's going on!' I screamed, I screamed so loud with all my strength and force. I tried to move my finger, my toes, my elbow, I just tried but I couldn't. Sadness starts to indulge me; fear starts to eat my will._

"_What's going on?" The footstep stopped and a harsh voice rang into my ears. _

"_Sir, We found her drifting on the middle of the sea, so we decided to pick her up." One of them spoke._

'_They... picked me up in the middle of the sea?' I thought and slowly I started to recall of why I was in the sea. Sadness and loneliness washed over me as I realized that my father, my very own blood related father wished for my existence no more. _

"_She was covered in blood and had nasty cuts everywhere in her body when we recovered her."_

"_I can see that... what happened to her? Is she still breathing?"_

_Numbed in anger and sadness, I didn't know what to do, who should I trust, and whom should I talk to? The world turned emotionless and heartless for me. I just wished I that I have died and didn't survive. _

'_I have no one and I'm alone all over again... right mama?'_

_

* * *

_

Opening my eyes abruptly from the sheer nightmare of my past; I lay down on my futon hearing my own breathing and feeling my chest rise and fall.

'How cruel can the world treat me?' I thought solemnly as I wipe off the beads of sweat from my forehead. Slowly forcing myself up from my futon, I stared at the empty room. A small apartment I am in; kitchen on the far upper right from my view, toilet just right beside the kitchen, a small room just opposite from the kitchen where I decided to use it as my bed room when it's cleaned up

And a small living room where I am currently sleeping on.

Crossing my leg on the futon, my tired and exhausted eyes scanned the unfamiliar room that I have decided to occupy once again. Imaginary things were slowly coming into view as I picture the things I would have to buy. A sad sigh escaped my lips and a lone tear flows out without my permission as I clench my fist tightly.

After a moment, I decided to drag myself to the bathroom to get freshen up. Or at least I hoped to be. The moment I turn the water knob, I yelped at the yellowish and muddy water flowing out. Disgusted with the water, I just stood there numbly until the water turned back into clear flowing fluid.

"_I apologized if the apartment is a total mess as it has been unoccupied for almost months." _Yamada's voice rang into her mind and a sigh escaped my lips. After a few moments, I decided to step into the shower to get myself washed up.

I didn't know how long I stood there letting the water wash over me in hopes to wash away the pain that resided deep in my heart until my phone rang aloud, playing its melody to gain my attention. Turning off the water knob in one swift movement, I grabbed my towel and wrapped myself tightly before I exit the bathroom and took my cell phone in hand.

I stared deeply into the cell phone display saying "Unknown caller". After a short debate within myself, I hung up the phone instantly.

'_Whoever it is, be damn with it. I'm not in the mood to talk.' _I thought as I toss my cell phone on my futon and proceeded to search for clothes to wear.

'_I'm going to need a lot of things... this is definitely going to be a long day for a Saturday.' _I thought as I threw my towel aside after dressing but then a realization hit me hard when I remembered today was Saturday. I groaned as I just missed my half day school on Saturday.

* * *

**Normal POV**

The sounds of the dialling tone were soon replaced by an engaged tone as a certain chestnut brunette pressed her purple coloured cell phone against her ear. A sigh came out from the small lips as slowly her eyes opened revealing a gorgeous crimson eye.

A minute ago, Shizuru tried to get in touch with Natsuki Kuga's cell phone but was cut off completely.

Half an hour ago, three teachers came barging into the student council's room complaining how Natsuki did not appear in class at all.

An hour ago, the school received a mysterious phone call threatening every teacher to kick Natsuki off from Fuuka or the consequences would be heavy.

A couple of hours ago, Tomoe amazingly got information that the two famous couple had broken off and is frantically asking Shizuru to be her girlfriend. She even begged Shizuru to move in to the same room as her.

Exactly fourteen hours ago, Natsuki broke down in front of her very crimson eyes, disappeared and never returned back to the room. Her side of the room were also very clean and tidy without any sign of the bluenette ever staying there except for the kitchen utensils.

Shizuru rubbed her temple as her finger ached to reach for her phone to call a certain bluenette again tempted to know the reason behind all the problems she is causing. The chestnut haired goddess had changed her number not long after her break up with a certain bluenette. However, the bluenette's number is deeply registered into her mind that she needed nothing to remind her of the number.

"It is very surprising to see the famous Fujino in distressed." Calm and polite voice break the very silence in the room.

"Ara, Reito, good afternoon." Shizuru said as she bowed lightly towards Reito. As a childhood friend of Shizuru, her exhausted crimson eyes were obvious to him no matter how good Shizuru is in pretending.

"So what happened? Someone is spreading rumours saying you and Kuga-san broke up. I hate to say this but I find it very surprising, you two make the best couple in Fuuka." Reito asked as he slowly pulled a chair out before sitting on it.

"The rumour isn't fake Reito. I broke up with Natsuki just a few days ago after receiving an email saying Natsuki were cheating on me. There were even pictures attached." Shizuru said as she sighed.

"Did you ever ask her? Or confront her? I still believe Kuga-san would never do anything like that Shizuru. I mean I saw how she stared at you during lunch time or when we had a party where you dragged her along. She's head over heels for you Shizuru." Reito said calmly as he stared deeply into Shizuru's eyes.

"I did ask her Reito... I did." Shizuru whispered as she stared down at her hand, holding on her purple cell phone.

"And let her explain herself over the pictures?" he asked again this time with a sly smile. He knew well enough that his childhood friend would jump straight into conclusions when it comes to the matter of a certain bluenette.

Shizuru's eyes were wide open when Reito hit her soft spot. She never did let Natsuki explain over the pictures when she broke up with her. The image of Natsuki's shocked face appeared into her mind where the bluenette would try to explain things only to get a painful slap from Shizuru.

Involuntarily, Shizuru gripped on her cell phone tightly as she stared at Reito's smiling face. Curious of why his childhood friend is siding Natsuki when they clearly hate each other.

"Reito? I thought you hated her." Shizuru questioned.

"Firstly, yes I admit we don't have a very well bonded friendship considering how we want to rip each other's throat out." Reito said chuckling. "However when it comes to my childhood friend, I admit that she really gave you happiness that your parents had never given you, Shizuru." He continued.

Lost in words, Shizuru kept her mouth shut as she stared at her childhood friend. Her mind is flowing with uncountable things while her emotion roared wildly.

'_What have I done...'_ Shizuru thought to herself as she brought her hands to cover her face. Images of the pained Natsuki, the tears that flowed out from the emerald eyes; everything are overwhelming even to Shizuru.

The lost and loneliness that Shizuru saw in the eyes of the bluenette yesterday caused her stomach to stir painfully and her heart sank down to her stomach. Her pumping heart emitted pain each time it contracts. Unable to hold such emotion, Shizuru closed her eyes and breathed slowly.

Looking at his childhood friend struggling within herself, Reito give a small sad smile as he thought to himself. _'I wish to see this no more... This is my thank you for making Shizuru so happy Kuga-san.' _The blacked hair guy stood up from his chair and glanced over to Shizuru.

"If you might want to know, I saw Kuga-san yesterday, searching for an apartment to move into. I don't know how to say this but... I've never seen that Ice princess so down and depressed. Her expression were heart wrenching. She looked like a dead lonely zombie wandering about. I think this incident took whatever that is left in her Shizuru." Reito said before he excused himself out from the student council room, knowing that Shizuru needed the time alone.

Just as the doors were shut, tears begin spilling from her crimson eyes. She felt as if her heart were pulled out completely leaving her body all cold. A huge lump appeared in her throat when she thought of Reito's words. _'I think this incident took whatever that is left in her...'_

Wiping off her tears, Shizuru stood up and walked out from the student council room. She didn't care if she is walking ungracefully anymore. All she wanted to do is go back to the dorms in hopes to find a certain bluenette there. It is the only way to Shizuru could think off since the bluenette had left the room yesterday.

When Shizuru reached her dorm, she quickly opened her door and stared into it. _"Shi-Shizuru!" _Natsuki stood there shocked at Shizuru's abrupt action. When the brunette blinked her eyes, her crimson eyes met with the cold and empty room.

Staring into the empty room, Shizuru for once in her life didn't know what to do. Her perfect mask slipped away revealing a shattered expression as she took a step into the room and silently closing the door.

By the time Shizuru stood facing the bed Natsuki used to occupy, tears begin to fall as she sank down to her knees, hugging the pillow tightly as she inhales deeply. Natsuki's scent instantly hits her nostrils and her heart cracked. Cries were heard from Shizuru's room not long after that. Her cries were desperate and regret coated deeply as students were then gathered around the kaichou's room; all shocked and worried for their idol.

* * *

Walking about the mall, Natsuki had brought some cheap but basic items for her apartment. She felt lucky that she Yamada agreed to fetch her to the mall since it would be hard to carry all these items with a bike. Yamada on the other hand were staring at Natsuki's back unable to shake off the sad feeling he had for the young bluenette as he followed her around the mall.

They were walking idly until Natsuki's eyes met with a cute purple Tako plush doll. A small sad smile made its way to her face when she stared at the plushie.

"I would have never guessed that you would love plush dolls." Yamada said from behind and Natsuki tensed; a small blush resides at her cheek.

"I don't normally like plush toys, but this particular one reminds me of someone important." A husky voice filed with sadness replied Yamada. Emerald eyes turned even sadder after she said that sentence.

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to remind you of the sad things." Yamada apologized unable to forgive himself for making the blunette sad.

"It's fine. Let's go, I think I brought enough basic items for the room." Natsuki said as she sprung around her heels and walked away with her boss following suit.

Yamada drove Natsuki back to her apartment where Natsuki once again thanked Yamada for his generosity. Yamada briefly told Natsuki that she will officially start work on the next Monday in hopes that she would settle down in her apartment first.

The bluentte started to clean the apartment thoroughly before she started to arrange all the items she brought. It took Natsuki 4 hours to finish what she started off with as she looked around her new home. The room is now clean and she had moved her futon into the room where inside resides a small foldable table on the corner with a study lamp. Cooking utensils are now kept into the readymade cupboard in the kitchen and a small fridge to keep her favourite drinks and mayonnaise.

Her living room and the dining area were the only empty place left as Natsuki didn't have much money to buy a dining table or a sofa and a television set. A small satisfied sigh were heard as she lean against the door of her room staring at the room.

'_This is it... where my new life begins without Shizuru...'_ Natsuki thought as she clenches her fist. As much as how Natsuki wanted to avoid thinking about the brunette, it seems that everything she does reminds her of Shizuru and it pained her so much her will to go on with life seems meaningless.

Bringing her hand up to her chest, she could feel her fragile heart, working in sadness without its partner. The same feeling were felt when Natsuki stared down to the ring that sits comfortably on her finger; the same squeezing pain in her heart and the huge lump in her throat.

Her body shivered lightly when she breathed in deeply. Natsuki had decided to take a ride out from the apartment. Grabbing her keys, Natsuki walked down to the car park and insert her key into the ignition. With a quick and swift move, Natsuki had her Ducatti roaring in life again and off into the busy streets.

Feeling the cold wind hitting her as she speed through the streets, the bluenette felt as if her pain and sadness were gone for the pure adrenaline bliss as she zoomed dangerously between cars and red lights. _'I have nothing to lose.'_ Natsuki thought as the idea of her getting into an accident haunted her.

The bluentte gripped tightly onto the accelerator as she took a sharp corner out from the exit and into the highway where she sways left and right to avoid slow cars.

Her ears could pick out curses and swears from a lot of people when she carelessly rode her bike. She is completely drowned in her own world until her cell phone started vibrating and a melody came into play, waking the bluenette up.

Sighning, Natsuki pulled her Ducatti to the side as she took out her cell phone. She stared for a moment when her caller ID is indicating that Reito is calling her. _'Why does pretty boy wants from me?'_ Natsuki thought as she flipped her cell phone.

"Kuga." Her cold and husky voice rang out loud to the caller.

"Kuga-san, its Reito here, I think you should head down to the dorm like immediately." Reito's voice came out fully coated in fear and worry. "It's Shizuru. Some student heard her crying for a long amount of time so they tried to call her but there was no reply. We had to call the dorm sister to open the door and she was already on the floor unconscious. Please come over. I think she needs you badly." He continued before he shut his phone. Natsuki just held her phone against her ear where the engaged tone were heard repeatedly as her eyes stared blankly at the street. Her heart were threatening to jump out from her rib cage as her hands were trembling in fear form the news she just heard.

'_Shi-Shizuru?'_

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**

* * *

**

Sorry again for the long wait.

Kuro- Thank you for reading this story. =]

j-swiss - sorry for the long wait but there it is i hope its good.

Kitty - lol thank you for the review. i'm glad you like it

Garrita salvatrucha- Thank you for reading, most of the emotions that are written out are mostly mine. xD was having a hard time in life and not to mention love life.

ShadowCub - Sorry Dx i hope this is not as painful.

Okami-chin - passes you napkins. Dx Well i hope you enjoy this chapter.

SKULLCANDii – your review made me smile! xD thanks alot for reading. It means a whole bunch for me

Indiobotod – i'm so sorry i made you cry. _ but certainly it would be a happy ending i hope. =X lets just see how my mind stir it up. –gives you napkins- Dx

kikyo4ever – Wow, xD thats unexpectedly long question but don't worry all of it will be answered in further chapters. One of them is answered in this chapter already. Glad you're following the story and i apologize for the horrible wait.

Karai-san I sincerely apologize for such a long wait when you were hoping for the update to be faster. Dx

MegaAuthor- i think everyone has their share of surgery in the story. xD i do feel extremely guilty for making people cry. =X

JAlec – i'm sorry for the long update. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

elfspirit7 – I apologize for the wait. Things have been going really bad resolving my life. It was hard to cope but as promised, I hope you enjoy the chapter.

venz07 – my apology for the wait. Please enjoy

H3artbreak3r – thanks for reading. I hope this chapter is good enough =]

Lonewolfrebel - _ omg DONT DIE! \O/ here's chapter 4. i'm so SORRY.

Momo Satake - \O/ Sorry for the wait. xD


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